Innocent Abroad

“Sleeping with a whore, breathing right in her mouth, endlessly listening to her pissing, putting up with her stupidity and never moving a step away from her—where’s the sense in that?”—Anton Chekhov
Alli always said if you fucked a girl more than three times, you’re dating her. Apparently your average twenty-something, modern, independent woman’s brain […]

Apparently, song-writing, dope-smoking and tax-evading aren’t the indomitable Willie Nelson’s only talents—now you can add ‘Horse Advocate’ and join me in a concerted ‘whaaaaa?’ I guess Willie put down his joint long enough to realize that 100,000 horses are being slaughtered in America every year to be exported as food to foreign countries. […]

So I was hired at Consumption Junction to write articles for their home page– signature graphic, email address, hate mail, the works (CHECK IT OUT!!!). It was a trip, though regretfully short-lived. Soon after I was fired from Consumption Junction, kind of… wanna fight about it? Actually, for the first time in […]

It’s been a rough few weeks.
For the past month I’ve become mist, and an explanation must be given. My life since mid-October has been an unbelievable, roiling mess and while I could not be more engaged, my ability to regularly write short pieces and possibly post them here has been extremely limited. I’ve […]